A Lost Mind

First off, I would just like to thank Todd over at The Good Mistake for the shout out. Now I'm giving him a shout out, check his stuff out at: http://todd138.blogspot.com/


OK, so again, as with most/all of my stories, I wrote this one pretty quickly. I'm not exactly sure how I feel about it, but I figured I'd post it anyways. Like I say in my blog description, it's a process; some things turn out good and some meh. Hopefully I get better as a I go.


There’s something there, I just can’t see it; something, gnawing at the back of my mind. Day and night, I can’t sleep. I sit awake in my bed, eyes wide open. I stare. I can’t help it. I stare at the wall, hoping that something will change right before my eyes.
As I stare into the nothingness the wall has to offer me I can feel my hands slowly gripping the covers. Gripping turns into clenching, and soon the blood flees my hands leaving them but a pail white in the moonlight. Insomnia, it has overcome me.
The daytime is no different. I often find myself staring into the distance, losing all sense of time and place. People stop to ask me if I’m ok; I rarely answer. Soon they lose interest in me and go about their merry ways.
Why do I stare? I can’t do anything else. There’s something their, eating away at my mind. I grab the back of my head with both hands, but it’s no use, I feel nothing. Whatever it is I can’t reach it. It stays hidden from me, but I know it’s there and I want it to stop.
“LEAVE ME ALONE!” I cry out at night. All I want to do is sleep, but it won’t let me. It keeps eating away at my mind. I fear I’m losing control; the intruder is taking over! I have to do something, and quick! If I don’t act soon I’ll have lost myself forever. GAAHHH! There it is again! GO AWAY! I just want some peace and quiet. No more of this constant agony! I must get it out, but how? The wall! The wall full of nothingness! All this time I’ve been staring, not understanding why, but it’s been calling me! The nothingness, the emptiness of the wall that engulfs me every night, it can save me now!
Stand man, to your feet! This is a matter of life and death! I struggle to get to my feet. That something inside my head is fighting me, but it won’t win, it can’t! As I stand in front of my bed, I muster up enough energy to make a dash for it. With my head aimed straight at the wall I begin running as fast as I can.
CRACK! My head plows into the wall leaving a small hole. I stagger back. The something is still there! Again, I move towards the wall, this time slowly. Once there, I put my hands up in front me, palms flush against the surface. It’s now or never.
BAM! BAM! BAM! I repeatedly hit my head against the wall, all the while screaming. I scream partially out of pain and partially as a war cry; a warning to that something inside my head, that something that won’t go away, until now.
After several minutes of bashing my head against the wall, I again stumble back. This time I feel something trickling down my forehead and into my mouth. The taste of iron hits my taste buds. Blood! This is war after all, I should’ve expected this.
Now, after tasting my own blood I feel weak. I no longer have the power to stand, so I fall to my knees. Slowly, I lay myself face down on the ground.
That something inside my head, I can’t feel it anymore, it’s finally gone! I’ve won! No more sleepless nights and dreary days for me, I’ve done it! Now I can take back my life for there is nothing left to control me! As I bask in my victory I close my eyes, and soon after I join the darkness that awaits me.